Old Spice and Netflix have teamed up to create deodorant based on The Witcher, including sticks that smell like "Yennefer's Underarm", "Geralt's Bathwater", and "Roach". Yay?
The crossover was announced through a, frankly pretty gross, commercial on Twitter that features a bunch of villagers talking about their BO before finding Old Spice. That's strange enough, but the real hook here is that Old Spice has gone as far as creating Witched-themed deodorants and the choices are, uh, well they're certainly a choice.
The first deodorant is named "Yennefer's Underarm", which is sure to get those Witcher fans to start paying attention. The Old Spice website even has a rhyme for it, "Flowers and fruits is how Yennefer smells, but why bother bathing when you can cast a spell? One whiff of her odour and you're trapped by her charms. Now imagine that power in the pit of your arms." God, I love my job.
The next of the strange deodorants is called "Geralt's Bathwater" which, although the dream of many to get a whiff of, is presented as a bad thing by Old Spice. The rhyme says as much, "This scent is made from Geralt's bathwater, as pungent as week-old battle slaughter. A soup of dirt and grime and blood, conveniently in stick form." That won't stop true Witcher fans though, mark my words.
Want another gross one? Of course you do. Next up is a smell named "Roach". This is already going to be bad before I've read the rhyme, but here we go, "The behind of Geralt's faithful steed makes an almighty reek indeed. The more they adventure, the more their love grows. Yet her rump tortures the Witcher's nose." Why you'd want to smell like horse arse is beyond me, but it's a clever crossover.
The remaining deodorants include the particularly brutal "Blaviken Before The Butcher", "Kikimora Corpse", and the "Smell Of Surprise", which sounds like it'll be like a lucky dip. Here's hoping you get "Yennefer's Underarm".
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