Many people have heard of Blaseball, but the murmurs about player incineration and players trapped in peanut shells make the online baseball game daunting.
Created by The Game Band, Blaseball is an online, alternate reality, surrealist fantasy baseball game. At the same time, it is not any of those things at all. The game transforms week-to-week, and while it models itself after America’s favorite pastime, it’s slowly getting further and further away from the sport.
If you’re interested in the game or just confused about what nonsense you keep reading online, we’ve answered some of the big questions below.
What is Blaseball?
Blaseball is a fantasy baseball game you can play online. You collect coins by betting on games and use those coins at the end of each week to vote for decrees and blessings that will change the game the next week.
How do I play?
You start by picking one of the teams, most of which are based on real locations. You’ll get coins for every game your team wins. From there, you’ll use your coins to bet on games, which start at the top of the hour.
You’ll also want to use your coins to buy upgrades, which allow you to gain more coins from wins and bet more coins per game.
What team should I pick?
You should pick whichever team tickles your fancy. While one team may seem dominant in the moment, since the game is constantly evolving, who is “good” will change from season to season.
Image: The Game Band
As of season 8, the Baltimore Crabs are the strongest team, but this could change very quickly.
What’s the best betting strategy?
When starting out, you should put all the coins you can into whatever team has the highest odds for the next game. Once you’re out of coins, head to the shop and beg for more. Then you’ll put those newly acquired coins into a game. Repeat the process until each game is bet on.
Once you have a lot of coins, players recommend putting in all your coins on a team with over 60% winning odds and ignoring the rest. Some will recommend betting the max amount on every game, but an unlucky day can cause you to end up with nothing, so be careful.
What upgrades should I focus on buying first?
Passive Incoming Potion is a great start, as that’ll boost your coin gain every time your team wins. If your team isn’t looking too hot this season, focus on High Roller Snake Oil first, which will allow you to bet higher amounts per game.
How long does a season last? What’s the Blaseball schedule?
Seasons take one week and they begin on Mondays at 12 p.m. ET. From then until Friday at 3 p.m. ET, there will be new games starting at the top of every hour.
Playoff games take place on Saturday starting at 9 a.m. ET.
Votes for Decrees and Blessings close on Sunday at 3 p.m. ET. The results are shown shortly after this.
Throughout the season, there may be Siestas — times when the players are “resting” and the site is unavailable. This is usually when the site is in maintenance or experiencing too much traffic. There have been several week-long Siestas, but these are typically announced in advance.
OK, I picked a team but I changed my mind. Can I switch?
You can buy a Fair Weather Flute in the shop for 2,000 coins. This will let you switch teams.
What’s the deal with Blessings and Decrees?
Votes can be purchased from the shop for 100 coins each. You can use these votes to enact a Decree, which will change the rules of the game. You can also vote to try to win Blessings from the Blaseball gods, which will buff your team, steal players from other teams, or do a plethora of other things that will likely benefit you.
Blessings are rewarded through a lottery system. Just because your team submits the most votes for a specific blessing doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll get it, but they’ll be the most likely to get it.
How do I know which Blessings or Decrees to vote for?
Fans often discuss this in the Blaseball Discord. You can select your team there and plot among the rest of your fanbase on what to do next.
Can I just hold my coins forever and build up a huge amount of wealth?
No. An “Eat the Rich” Decree was implemented, so at the end of the season, the 1% of players holding the most coins get their wealth redistributed to the 99%. Spend those coins or risk saying goodbye to all your money.
What are Idols?
You can pick one player to idolize and every time they hit runs or pitch outs, you’ll get coins. You can change your Idol for 200 coins, but not while games are being played.
Why does the Idol leaderboard have an ominous red dotted line?
At the end of the season, all idols above the dotted line will … well, it’s not really clear. So far, we’ve had idols get “shelled” and stuck in peanut shells, rendering them useless. Idols above the red line who had “peanut” in their name gained a “Honey Roasted” buff, but we’re not sure what it does.
Image: The Game Band
In general, you do not want your teams best players above that red line.
Wait, buffs? There are player buffs?
When you click on teams, you can see individual players as well. Click on them and some of them will have squares with mysterious little icons in them. Some of them explain what they do, some of them don’t. We know just as much as you do when it comes to these scary squares.
What’s with those weird weather icons?
Weather in the Blaseball universe is not like weather in real life. Each weather condition has a different effect and can randomly cause special things to happen:
- Peanuts: Stray peanuts may fly into players mouths forcing them to have a “yummy reaction,” which increases player stats, or an “allergic reaction,” which decreases player stats.
- Lots of Birds: There are birds. Sometimes they may peck a “shelled” player free.
- Feedback: Players can swap teams randomly.
- Solar Eclipse: The umpire may incinerate a random player. They’ll be replaced by a new player immediately.
- Reverb: Player positions may shuffle.
- Blooddrain: Players may absorb stats from another player.
More weather is constantly being added, but this is the list as of season 8.
What’s with the peanuts?
After being voted as a Decree in season 2, peanuts have infiltrated the game. This added peanut weather, as well as peanuts you can eat. Eating peanuts doesn’t seem to do anything, but they are crunchy and delicious.
What are Blagonballs?
Nobody really knows, but they’re “found” by players when they play exceptionally, like pitching a no-hitter.
What’s the deal with Jaylen Hotdogfingers?
Jaylen Hotdogfingers was the first player to be incinerated by an umpire and then brought back from the dead as a community effort. One blessing allowed a team to steal the 14th ranked player on the Idol board, and many players picked Jaylen as their idol, just to bump her to the 14th position to see what would happen. It was successful, and the Seattle Garages picked her up, resurrecting her in the process.
When she pitched again after returning, she beaned several players with the ball, giving them an “unstable” tag. These players were later incinerated by umpires, and they spread the instability to other players. These players were also later incinerated. Eventually it was revealed that this was the cost of resurrecting her.
Is there canon lore for the players?
Yes and no. Dedicated fans have come up with designs, personalities, and backstories for the players, mostly based off the interesting names. The Blaseball team retweets these stories and shares them, so while they’re not extremely official, they are somewhat supported by the developer.
An absurdist baseball game is tearing up the internet, thanks to fans
You can find out more information about the players on the Blaseball Fandom Wiki.
This is extremely bizarre.
Welcome to Blaseball.
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